General Conference Activities

Alright people, I'm about to be real. For those who don't know, my church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, has two annual worldwide meetings known as general conference. It's 5 two hour sessions over two days of uplifting messages and instruction to be better people. It's great! That being said, this last one in October was the first time I had four children. I love my children immensely BUT 8 hours of gospel instruction over one weekend is a lot for their little bodies. (Note: I did do math correctly, one session is for members older than any of my children) With either that extra child or just the ages of my kids, I felt like I got the least out of conference in my life. This time, I wanted to have some activities under my belt to do. Here's what we've got:

I started with these popsicle stick puzzles. I just printed some pictures off on my computer - Christ, missionaries, temples, etc. and then lined up my sticks. I will tell you something that I learned. Printer paper isn't as sturdy as a photo, like she uses on her blog. The mod podge was smearing the colours and then transfering them to the container. Ugh. They also tear more easily, both in the application and the cutting. But, I have six ready to go and all things considered, they're pretty great.

Next up is a General Conference Wall. I'm doing it a little differently than she does. I'm going to put up pictures representing common words or stories from conference and whenever anyone hears one of them, they get to put a little sticker on the picture (in a page protector - don't worry, we're not wrecking pictures). Kids love stickers, right? Now, I need your input. The last few times, we've had chosen words and you'd get a candy if you heard it. I've decided, right now, that method doesn't help our home be peaceful and quiet while I'm trying to listen. Initially, I was thinking of just giving each of them a few treats after each two hour block. But now I'm thinking if each child has a different colour sticker, I could count up how many they have by the end and they get that many treats. Give me your thoughts on that. I'd love some other parent feedback.

If I get myself organized enough, I'd like to do this one also: conference mosaic. I think I'd just let them free for all the squares rather than drawing anything and having specific colours. I'll let you know how this goes if I do it.

Okay, now this one makes me a little vulnerable. I don't usually share things I have created for others to use but I thought this might help some of you fellow parents. I found a general authority memory game but it was quite outdated. I think 5 of the apostles have since died and all three women's auxiliary leaders have since been released. So I made my own. It has four pages. The first two are match the faces and the last two are match the person with their random fact. I'm sending them off to staples to print on heavy card stock. I won't have time before conference begins to do anything more than cut them. I might back them with fun patterned paper - two different types to differentiate the two games - or get them laminated...or both.

What are you doing with your kiddos over this conference weekend? Do you have any conference traditions?

If you are interested in checking out any of the sessions, they're at 10am, 2pm, 6pm (this is for the men in April and for the women in October) Saturday April 6 and 10am, 2pm Sunday April 7. You can watch here or live on youtube.

And Then We Were Six

3:30 in the morning, June 8th, I was awoken by a common occurrence experienced by countless pregnant women - the urge to use the bathroom. Up I waddled and upon returning to bed, I started feeling more contractions. Here was the dreaded question I had been asking myself for days: "Are these real labour contractions or just the fake stuff?" As I lay there tossing and turning, trying to get comfortable during the contractions, I finally decided to leave my bed and try to walk them off at 4:30, or at least time them and see where we were at. Well, things amped up rather quickly and they started coming like crazy after the walking started - not very long, under a minute but closer than two minutes apart. At 4:40, I let Matt know we were probably heading to the hospital soon and I called my mom to see what she thought. After talking for awhile, she agreed I should probably call my neighbour to come watch the kids so I could head out. The announcement was made that we were going to the hospital and Matt said, "I'm going to take a quick shower." (Any of you mamas had your husbands take showers before taking you to the hospital??? I was thinking "What the heck?!" but he ended up being ready before our neighbour was over, so all was well. Ha!) We were out of the house by 5:00 on our way to the Grey Nuns.

Getting my drugs!

I came to the realization late in this pregnancy that I have a low pain threshold. This was made apparent as I was begging for an epidural on the way in...okay, more insisting that as soon as I set foot in the hospital, they make the anesthesiologist aware that I needed drugs pronto. Contractions had simmered down a little but were still coming around 5 minutes apart and getting longer and stronger. Matt dropped me off at the emergency doors and I waddled in. There's nothing quite like checking yourself in at the hospital in the middle of contractions. Yikes. The attendant was there quickly and soon enough, I was on a bed being checked and monitored. *Now, here I have to make an aside. For those of you who may not know my doctor, Dr. Chua, he is known for being generous with his measurements. That means, when he says you're 3 cm dilated, others would say 2. Both of the previous times I have gone into labour on my own, they've checked me and I've been the same dilation as what was last written on my charts. Because he's generous, I probably was more dilated but on paper it always looked like I wasn't so I had to spend agonizing hours walking the halls to try to move things along. * Back to the story, upon being checked, it was made known that I had gone from a 3 on two days before to a 5. That meant I automatically got admitted! I can't tell you how much of a relief that was to my hurting body! 6:15 and we were in, the anesthesiologist knew I wanted the epidural and I was happy!

The last photo of me pregnant

By 7:00, the drugs were doing their thing. So awesome! In enters my favourite nurse, Francesca. Truth be told, in my four deliveries at the Grey Nuns, I have loved all my labour and delivery nurses but if this is our last baby, Francesca was the best nurse to end with. She was fun, funny, answered all my silly last minute questions I had never thought to ask during other labours, encouraged me to sleep and saw to all my needs. Seriously, love her! She was there until the end and we were both happy she got to meet our little man!

Francesca! P.S. She was a total doppleganger of Candice Behr! The picture doesn't do it justice. Just trust me!

Around 7:30, Francesca had caught Dr. Chua to see what course of action he wanted to pursue. His response was, "No one touch that woman!" He had his daughter's convocation that morning at U of A and would be back around noon. He knew if my membranes were ruptured, I'd be long gone before he returned. Ha! He makes me laugh. :) This worked out well as I wasn't in pain anymore and I could get a little rest in before the many sleepless nights I knew were ahead of me. Between cat naps, Matt and I also played some gin rummy to pass the time. ;)

Francesca checked me again around noon and I was still only 5 cm dilated. That was a little irritating, that it had been six hours and no progression, but then I remembered that at least those six hours weren't spent in pain. Noon rolled around and no Dr. Chua. We shouldn't have been surprised though since we know how long university convocations are. At 1:30. Dr Chua was back on site and gave the resident doctor the go ahead to rupture my membranes. Guys, there was a "Goosh". It was the most water I've ever had, soaking all sorts of hospital pads! Then, Dr. Chua came and asked the resident if she had done something something with the catheter, pushing something out of the way of the birth canal and she had no idea what he was talking about. That's just what you want. Haha! I'm glad I got to be part of a learning moment but let me tell you, as I've never felt this part before, it's easier to move the thing before the membranes are ruptured than after.

Throughout the next hour, Francesca would check in, asking if I felt the urge to push. By 2:45, I thought I *maybe* felt like pushing so she checked. I was at an 8. Somewhere in that hour, there was a requisition given for oxytocin from the doctor. At this point, Francesca said, "I'm off in an hour, you've been in labour long enough, let's get that baby out so I can meet him!" I agreed and she hooked me up. Within two minutes, I was quite sure I was ready to push. Upon checking this time, she said, "Yep! I can see the head!" Prep began and I was told to avoid pushing as Dr. Chua had a seven minute walk to get to L&D.

Due to my epidural and the small top up I had about an hour and a half earlier, I was pretty frozen. Not quite as bad as with Liesel, but this time, they brought out the stirrups. There's a first for everything. Then the pushing began. Three contractions, seven pushes and he was out! My precious babe was handed to me and I got to cuddle this sweet spirit I had carried and given my all to for the last few months. There is so much love that goes into a baby who was a little more trying to carry. At least, that's my sentiment. (Also, *Note* I was much more assertive this time as mother of four than I was as a first time mom. I had requested skin-to-skin with both Oakley and Micah and both were handed to me while I was clothed and they were wrapped. With Oakley, I just went with it, even though I felt crushed to miss that opportunity. With Micah, I took things into my own hands and made it happen.)

Micah Paul Kastendieck made his first time appearance on Earth at 3:08 PM June 8th, 2018. He weighed in at 7 lb 7 oz, the biggest of our babies by half a pound, and measured 21 inches long. He was and is pure perfection!

If he is our last, man! What an ending! His delivery was by far the best. We had fantastic nurses the whole time, even in postpartum, where I've had my fair share of not-so-nice nurses, I got my epidural quickly and was able to avoid the agony of those contractions a lot sooner, I was able to rest, which was much needed considering the early start to my labour and the poor sleep I had, the postpartum nurses didn't hassle us about paperwork (ask me about that sometime), and there were no complications or delays. These were little blessings for us that I know were sent mindfully for me.

Now, as most of you are here mostly for the pictures, here they are:

Theme rooms no longer have double beds :(

Sabbath Thoughts on Motherhood and Children

So, as many of you know, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, commonly referred to as the Mormons. Each month, one Sunday is set aside for the bearing of testimonies. This gives an opportunity for any member, from the littlest to the oldest, long time member or brand new, to come up and share the things they know to be true.

Today, we had a wonderful meeting with lots of powerful testimonies. Near the end, I felt impressed that I needed to share something I learned to be true this week. I hesitated, as I'm sure many other members have done, thinking. "Oh, it's not that important. I won't get up." But it kept nagging at me. Finally, I went to stand up, right as our Branch President (layman leader of our congregation) stood up to close the meeting. I had lost my chance. But then I got thinking, if it was important for me to tell, I could always add it to my blog. ;) So here we are.

This week, I had a horrid mom moment. I won't get into too much of the details. What you need to know is: pregnant mother trying to be productive in her home, ends up having to clean up two big soapy messes in a short amount of time instead of doing the work she was going to do, much yelling and angry feelings. Right in the midst of this, my eldest, who is in kindergarten, came up to me in the bathroom and handed me an envelope. On it, in his best spelling, he had written "I luv Mom so much Luv Oakley". I started to cry and just held him. At this point he said to me, "You usually comfort us." I told him it felt very good to be comforted by him in that moment.

So, two things came out of this. The first was a testimony of something one of our world leaders had taught at our general conference we had had just the previous weekend. He said this - "In stressful moments—perhaps when you are chasing little ones and a charred smell from the kitchen informs you that your lovingly prepared dinner is now a burnt offering—know that God sanctifies your most difficult days." Now, to sanctify means to make holy. This was most definitely a difficult day for me. In and amidst the frustration and the anger and hurt I was feeling, God was able to work through my 6 year old to bring some peace and holiness back into our home. It was huge!

The second point I now have a testimony of is Christ's guidance to become as little children. Many times I have heard that and many times I have thought about all of the difficulties that come with children. They don't always listen to me, they fight with each other, they whine, cry, throw tantrums, and the list continues. But my sweet boy was way closer to my Savior on that day than I was. He was meek, full of love, patient with his imperfect mama, and had a desire to serve. All of those things have been manifest time and time again, among other Christlike attributes, in all of my children and I hope to be like them some day.

May we all strive to be as little children, to love a little more, forgive quickly and be kind, especially to those who we feel may not deserve it (like this mama on that day). And for my fellow mamas, God does sanctify our most difficult days! Keep going.

Tender mercies

I firmly believe that I have a Father in Heaven who is mindful of me. I have had too many instances that were too perfect for what I needed right at that time that could not be explained as coincidence. I am grateful for each and every one of those moments and today I had a particularly moving moment.

As many of you mothers I'm sure, I have been struggling with my self worth as a mother. I never feel like I'm patient enough, engaging enough, loving enough, etc. etc. etc. Today was especially trying. I felt unsure of our future and how I would be able to be the mom I need to be with everything going on and my ever present struggles.

Enter in my angel. In the middle of the shoe isle in Walmart with two boys running up the isles and a cart rolling away from me while I tried to get boots on a little girl, a woman walked up to me. She looked a little sheepish as she said, "Excuse me?" I thought I was right in her way and apologized but then she surprised me. "No, that's not it. I'm not sure how to say this but I felt like I needed to tell you that you are a great mother. I can just tell. You have beautiful children and you are doing a good job. I don't know why I felt that but I just felt so strongly that I needed to tell you that. I have an 18 year old and a 20 year old and I want to tear up seeing you with your children. You are a good mom."

By this time, I am tearing up and I sincerely thanked this woman and told her I so needed to hear that. I was even tempted to go and find her after we figured out the boot situation and give her a hug but with three littles and various activities, I didn't take the time to search for her and she wasn't on our way out.

Now she even said herself she had no idea why she felt like saying that but I know clearly that she was sent to be my angel and give me a message from my Heavenly Father to help me in a time for stress and anxiety. That woman will forever hold my gratitude. I am grateful for those who are able to set aside social norms and open themselves up to be His hands.

So, fellow mothers, even though we might be struggling with our journey through motherhood, we are doing a good job. Keep it up. Know that your children love even if you aren't perfect and that your Heavenly Father loves you too. And always keep a watch for those tender mercies. ♥

The Woman Who Started it All - And the Party We Had to Celebrate

Today is a special day and I think everyone everywhere should take a moment to reflect on the wonderful day the world was blessed by the birth of the one, the only, my mother. My mom is a pretty splendid lady! She's loving, so selfless and would do anything for her children. She has had ups and downs in life and always remains strong. She's the reason why the day after my dad died, we were all at church. :)She's goofy, funny, happy, bubbly, sassy, and will always have a Christmas decoration up somewhere. She has raised 8 children and we all turned out pretty good, I think. There has been something so special about sharing my love for her with my children and I love seeing her hold them for the first time or cuddle with them or read them a story. She really is the greatest. I love my mama more than words can express.

Last year was my grandma's 95th birthday the week before my mom's 65th. With all the activity and buzz surrounding my grandma's party, my mom's birthday got lost and I have to admit *ashamedly* we didn't do anything for her big milestone birthday. Not even a family dinner. Sometimes we're not so good kids, I guess. Mom lamented to me and my sister one day that she was a little disappointed that nothing really happened for her birthday, so Heidi and I decided to throw her a surprise 66th birthday this year.

My brother and his family from Idaho were coming up in March for a med school interview and visit so we decided we'd have a really early surprise party! She'd never expect that! Even better was our cover. If you are ever throwing a surprise party for someone, tell them you are throwing a surprise party for someone else! It just happened to be my other brother and his wife's 30th birthdays the following week. She had no clue. Remarks were made the week coming up to the party that she felt like she didn't know anything about the party and felt so out of the loop. Meanwhile, we are all laughing and feeling smug inside. Seriously. Best. Cover. Ever.

Day of the party comes and we get Phil and Lisa to take Mom for the day so she has no reason to be suspicious when we won't let her help decorate. Since it was her 66th birthday, we went with a Route 66 theme and had roads on the wall with streamers and maps and cars for centrepieces and different road signs along the walls. Everything came together well and we were ready to go. We'd even heard back from quite a few of the guests and if you know many LDS people, that's quite remarkable. We're not known for being the best at RSVPing...

Notice the Christmas garland in the background AND the Easter wreath!

Food was prepped, tables up and decorated, grandkids were practicing their song (some for the first time), kids were practicing their song, guests were arriving. Meanwhile, my dear Sister-in-law is texting me that they got a flat tire and will be a little late and various other updates. Then, my phone rings and it's my mother. "Sorry honey! We're trying to get there before Greg and Ashley. Where are we supposed to meet?" "Oh, in the gym. By the way, where are you?" "Just crossing the tracks into town." (That meant they were about 10 blocks away) So I hurriedly replied, "Ok, bye!" and hung up on her, raced into the gym and told everyone to get into place. A friend of Mom's suggested (since they were all in on the ruse) that those not connected to the family or the branch should hide out of the way so they wouldn't give it away right away. Great idea, Thelma! In walks my mom and we immediately yell SURPRISE and start singing Happy Birthday while her friends moved into view. It was amazing! We're all still kicking ourselves that no one recorded it. She was laughing it off to begin with, thinking we were joking around but then we kept singing. When her friends came out, you could see confusion on her face. It took a little while more and then the tears started. It was heartwarming and exhilarating knowing we had wholly surprised her.

She felt so special and it made my heart happy that we were able to help her know how loved she is by so many people. There was visiting and snacking before we got into a short program. The grandchildren sang, the children sang, my wonderful sister-in-law made a beautiful slideshow, my eldest brother gave a speech and my sister and I presented her with a book of memories of my dad - something that we've been working on for a long time. I think we made her cry for every part of the program which isn't that hard to do, but for some reason it makes me feel smug. :)

I still look back and think it went over smashingly well, better than I could ever have hoped. I truly believe there was help from the other side, probably from her sweetheart who wants her to know how loved she is. Thanks Dad for the help! xoxo

Love you Mama!

Sugar and Spice

Our little girl has brought sugar and spice and everything nice to our home. How has it been a year?? This sweet girl came to us 365 days ago. She has the sweetest smile and gets so excited when she sees her parents. She absolutely ADORES her brothers even though they are a little rough sometimes. She has given us a run for our money in her ability to get into trouble. :) She loves standing at the bookshelf and pulling books out, she has a sixth sense about the bathroom door being opened and will make a run for it every chance she has. Toilet paper is the best entertainment! Liesel is so close to walking and loves to be free. But she still loves cuddles. My heart is full whenever I look at my precious girl. Here are some favourite photos from her first year:

She pulls her blankets up over her face when going to sleep

Happy Birthday, my sweet girl!