And Then We Were Six

3:30 in the morning, June 8th, I was awoken by a common occurrence experienced by countless pregnant women - the urge to use the bathroom. Up I waddled and upon returning to bed, I started feeling more contractions. Here was the dreaded question I had been asking myself for days: "Are these real labour contractions or just the fake stuff?" As I lay there tossing and turning, trying to get comfortable during the contractions, I finally decided to leave my bed and try to walk them off at 4:30, or at least time them and see where we were at. Well, things amped up rather quickly and they started coming like crazy after the walking started - not very long, under a minute but closer than two minutes apart. At 4:40, I let Matt know we were probably heading to the hospital soon and I called my mom to see what she thought. After talking for awhile, she agreed I should probably call my neighbour to come watch the kids so I could head out. The announcement was made that we were going to the hospital and Matt said, "I'm going to take a quick shower." (Any of you mamas had your husbands take showers before taking you to the hospital??? I was thinking "What the heck?!" but he ended up being ready before our neighbour was over, so all was well. Ha!) We were out of the house by 5:00 on our way to the Grey Nuns.

Getting my drugs!

I came to the realization late in this pregnancy that I have a low pain threshold. This was made apparent as I was begging for an epidural on the way in...okay, more insisting that as soon as I set foot in the hospital, they make the anesthesiologist aware that I needed drugs pronto. Contractions had simmered down a little but were still coming around 5 minutes apart and getting longer and stronger. Matt dropped me off at the emergency doors and I waddled in. There's nothing quite like checking yourself in at the hospital in the middle of contractions. Yikes. The attendant was there quickly and soon enough, I was on a bed being checked and monitored. *Now, here I have to make an aside. For those of you who may not know my doctor, Dr. Chua, he is known for being generous with his measurements. That means, when he says you're 3 cm dilated, others would say 2. Both of the previous times I have gone into labour on my own, they've checked me and I've been the same dilation as what was last written on my charts. Because he's generous, I probably was more dilated but on paper it always looked like I wasn't so I had to spend agonizing hours walking the halls to try to move things along. * Back to the story, upon being checked, it was made known that I had gone from a 3 on two days before to a 5. That meant I automatically got admitted! I can't tell you how much of a relief that was to my hurting body! 6:15 and we were in, the anesthesiologist knew I wanted the epidural and I was happy!

The last photo of me pregnant

By 7:00, the drugs were doing their thing. So awesome! In enters my favourite nurse, Francesca. Truth be told, in my four deliveries at the Grey Nuns, I have loved all my labour and delivery nurses but if this is our last baby, Francesca was the best nurse to end with. She was fun, funny, answered all my silly last minute questions I had never thought to ask during other labours, encouraged me to sleep and saw to all my needs. Seriously, love her! She was there until the end and we were both happy she got to meet our little man!

Francesca! P.S. She was a total doppleganger of Candice Behr! The picture doesn't do it justice. Just trust me!

Around 7:30, Francesca had caught Dr. Chua to see what course of action he wanted to pursue. His response was, "No one touch that woman!" He had his daughter's convocation that morning at U of A and would be back around noon. He knew if my membranes were ruptured, I'd be long gone before he returned. Ha! He makes me laugh. :) This worked out well as I wasn't in pain anymore and I could get a little rest in before the many sleepless nights I knew were ahead of me. Between cat naps, Matt and I also played some gin rummy to pass the time. ;)

Francesca checked me again around noon and I was still only 5 cm dilated. That was a little irritating, that it had been six hours and no progression, but then I remembered that at least those six hours weren't spent in pain. Noon rolled around and no Dr. Chua. We shouldn't have been surprised though since we know how long university convocations are. At 1:30. Dr Chua was back on site and gave the resident doctor the go ahead to rupture my membranes. Guys, there was a "Goosh". It was the most water I've ever had, soaking all sorts of hospital pads! Then, Dr. Chua came and asked the resident if she had done something something with the catheter, pushing something out of the way of the birth canal and she had no idea what he was talking about. That's just what you want. Haha! I'm glad I got to be part of a learning moment but let me tell you, as I've never felt this part before, it's easier to move the thing before the membranes are ruptured than after.

Throughout the next hour, Francesca would check in, asking if I felt the urge to push. By 2:45, I thought I *maybe* felt like pushing so she checked. I was at an 8. Somewhere in that hour, there was a requisition given for oxytocin from the doctor. At this point, Francesca said, "I'm off in an hour, you've been in labour long enough, let's get that baby out so I can meet him!" I agreed and she hooked me up. Within two minutes, I was quite sure I was ready to push. Upon checking this time, she said, "Yep! I can see the head!" Prep began and I was told to avoid pushing as Dr. Chua had a seven minute walk to get to L&D.

Due to my epidural and the small top up I had about an hour and a half earlier, I was pretty frozen. Not quite as bad as with Liesel, but this time, they brought out the stirrups. There's a first for everything. Then the pushing began. Three contractions, seven pushes and he was out! My precious babe was handed to me and I got to cuddle this sweet spirit I had carried and given my all to for the last few months. There is so much love that goes into a baby who was a little more trying to carry. At least, that's my sentiment. (Also, *Note* I was much more assertive this time as mother of four than I was as a first time mom. I had requested skin-to-skin with both Oakley and Micah and both were handed to me while I was clothed and they were wrapped. With Oakley, I just went with it, even though I felt crushed to miss that opportunity. With Micah, I took things into my own hands and made it happen.)

Micah Paul Kastendieck made his first time appearance on Earth at 3:08 PM June 8th, 2018. He weighed in at 7 lb 7 oz, the biggest of our babies by half a pound, and measured 21 inches long. He was and is pure perfection!

If he is our last, man! What an ending! His delivery was by far the best. We had fantastic nurses the whole time, even in postpartum, where I've had my fair share of not-so-nice nurses, I got my epidural quickly and was able to avoid the agony of those contractions a lot sooner, I was able to rest, which was much needed considering the early start to my labour and the poor sleep I had, the postpartum nurses didn't hassle us about paperwork (ask me about that sometime), and there were no complications or delays. These were little blessings for us that I know were sent mindfully for me.

Now, as most of you are here mostly for the pictures, here they are:

Theme rooms no longer have double beds :(

Sabbath Thoughts on Motherhood and Children

So, as many of you know, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, commonly referred to as the Mormons. Each month, one Sunday is set aside for the bearing of testimonies. This gives an opportunity for any member, from the littlest to the oldest, long time member or brand new, to come up and share the things they know to be true.

Today, we had a wonderful meeting with lots of powerful testimonies. Near the end, I felt impressed that I needed to share something I learned to be true this week. I hesitated, as I'm sure many other members have done, thinking. "Oh, it's not that important. I won't get up." But it kept nagging at me. Finally, I went to stand up, right as our Branch President (layman leader of our congregation) stood up to close the meeting. I had lost my chance. But then I got thinking, if it was important for me to tell, I could always add it to my blog. ;) So here we are.

This week, I had a horrid mom moment. I won't get into too much of the details. What you need to know is: pregnant mother trying to be productive in her home, ends up having to clean up two big soapy messes in a short amount of time instead of doing the work she was going to do, much yelling and angry feelings. Right in the midst of this, my eldest, who is in kindergarten, came up to me in the bathroom and handed me an envelope. On it, in his best spelling, he had written "I luv Mom so much Luv Oakley". I started to cry and just held him. At this point he said to me, "You usually comfort us." I told him it felt very good to be comforted by him in that moment.

So, two things came out of this. The first was a testimony of something one of our world leaders had taught at our general conference we had had just the previous weekend. He said this - "In stressful moments—perhaps when you are chasing little ones and a charred smell from the kitchen informs you that your lovingly prepared dinner is now a burnt offering—know that God sanctifies your most difficult days." Now, to sanctify means to make holy. This was most definitely a difficult day for me. In and amidst the frustration and the anger and hurt I was feeling, God was able to work through my 6 year old to bring some peace and holiness back into our home. It was huge!

The second point I now have a testimony of is Christ's guidance to become as little children. Many times I have heard that and many times I have thought about all of the difficulties that come with children. They don't always listen to me, they fight with each other, they whine, cry, throw tantrums, and the list continues. But my sweet boy was way closer to my Savior on that day than I was. He was meek, full of love, patient with his imperfect mama, and had a desire to serve. All of those things have been manifest time and time again, among other Christlike attributes, in all of my children and I hope to be like them some day.

May we all strive to be as little children, to love a little more, forgive quickly and be kind, especially to those who we feel may not deserve it (like this mama on that day). And for my fellow mamas, God does sanctify our most difficult days! Keep going.